[ he doesnβt expect the story, but he stays silent to let chloe tell it. none of itβs familiar to him, as it shouldnβt be, and yet the beats of it spring a vague sense of recognition all the same, if only because they speak to his habits, and what he honestly would have done in that position, that heβd done all he could to keep chloe safe if heβd been that very same frank castle.
he recalls what wynonna had told him once too, about believing him to be a good man, and thereβs still in guilt in that expanded idea despite all the blood on his hands, the kind that he sought out himself without any trickery or mind-alteration. ]
All you girls are pretty damn stubborn, you know that? [ chloe, wynonna, laura. but despite that, thereβs nothing ill-intended in his tone, reluctant to fight an argument about his depth of βgoodβ heβs had to debate more than once.
but the few beats of silence that follow eventually comes with a sigh. ] Yβknow, I donβt β I donβt have those memories and I canβt exactly take credit for what some other version of me did, but ... all of that, Iβd still do it for you if I could. And Iβve definitely done my part in being an ass to you here, but you β you still got me if you need me. It ainβt just Laura I want to keep safe.
[ The chuckle she lets out is weak, but it's still a form of laughter, so that's got to count for something. ]
I get told that a lot.
[ Usually it's not something she takes as a compliment, but she's assuming it isn't meant as an insult here, given his tone. ]
Yeah. I know you would. [ Even if she sounds tired, it still sounds like she means it. Chloe has never been one to say things just to make someone feel better, after all, and she's sure that that's been more than abundantly clear. ] Seems like you've got your hands full with that one, though. Don't worry about me too much. I've gotten real good at taking care of myself.
[ not that she shouldn't be capable at taking care of herself, and it isn't him reprimanding her in the way that he does the "kids" in this town.
he's forced loneliness on himself, seen the danger he could bring forth on others and has tried time and again to fence himself off, usually with success. and maybe, he'd still be doing just that right now, if certain people hadn't crept beneath his skin to force him out of that shell, enabling him to avoid completely securing his personal barriers. he might still be prone to not exposing all of those deeper concerns, puddles of guilt, and emotionally crippling memories of pain β but he's been better and that counts for something. ]
Look, just β don't think twice about it. Don't worry about my load. Something happens, just reach out, yeah?
[ Oh how she wishes she could say yes to that offer honestly. Chloe knows herself too well though; sheβs still the type who believes herself better off alone, who doesnβt want others to come to any harm taking care of her. Thereβs been maybe one or two people who have broken the wall enough for her to admit when she isnβt okay to, but it still takes getting to an absolute breaking point before it happens.
Dying so many times means another death doesnβt seem so bad. Better her than the people here who arenβt used to it. Emotional burdens arenβt any better when everyone has so much to deal with and so many others to care for.
Sheβs glad it isnβt video so she at least doesnβt have to fake a smile. All she needs is to get her voice to hit that pitch that maybe sounds authentic. ]
Okay. Yeah. Iβll keep that in mind, Frank.
Edited (too many at leasts :|) 2019-08-14 01:56 (UTC)
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he recalls what wynonna had told him once too, about believing him to be a good man, and thereβs still in guilt in that expanded idea despite all the blood on his hands, the kind that he sought out himself without any trickery or mind-alteration. ]
All you girls are pretty damn stubborn, you know that? [ chloe, wynonna, laura. but despite that, thereβs nothing ill-intended in his tone, reluctant to fight an argument about his depth of βgoodβ heβs had to debate more than once.
but the few beats of silence that follow eventually comes with a sigh. ] Yβknow, I donβt β I donβt have those memories and I canβt exactly take credit for what some other version of me did, but ... all of that, Iβd still do it for you if I could. And Iβve definitely done my part in being an ass to you here, but you β you still got me if you need me. It ainβt just Laura I want to keep safe.
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I get told that a lot.
[ Usually it's not something she takes as a compliment, but she's assuming it isn't meant as an insult here, given his tone. ]
Yeah. I know you would. [ Even if she sounds tired, it still sounds like she means it. Chloe has never been one to say things just to make someone feel better, after all, and she's sure that that's been more than abundantly clear. ] Seems like you've got your hands full with that one, though. Don't worry about me too much. I've gotten real good at taking care of myself.
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[ not that she shouldn't be capable at taking care of herself, and it isn't him reprimanding her in the way that he does the "kids" in this town.
he's forced loneliness on himself, seen the danger he could bring forth on others and has tried time and again to fence himself off, usually with success. and maybe, he'd still be doing just that right now, if certain people hadn't crept beneath his skin to force him out of that shell, enabling him to avoid completely securing his personal barriers. he might still be prone to not exposing all of those deeper concerns, puddles of guilt, and emotionally crippling memories of pain β but he's been better and that counts for something. ]
Look, just β don't think twice about it. Don't worry about my load. Something happens, just reach out, yeah?
no subject
Dying so many times means another death doesnβt seem so bad. Better her than the people here who arenβt used to it. Emotional burdens arenβt any better when everyone has so much to deal with and so many others to care for.
Sheβs glad it isnβt video so she at least doesnβt have to fake a smile. All she needs is to get her voice to hit that pitch that maybe sounds authentic. ]
Okay. Yeah. Iβll keep that in mind, Frank.